I wanted to take the time to reflect on what last month in FL has meant for me. I knew that I would see everyone who was truly important to me, and I have. I feel that, under the right circumstances, I could have done more.

You don't know what having a good mass transit system is until you're in a place that has a shitty one.

A lot has happened since December 1st.

Lexi removed me as a friend from both FetLife, from Facebook, and even Melo and refuses to speak with me. I am still really confused about how I feel about that. I miss him dearly.

I reconnected with someone I hadn't talked to for about two years, and he's now on FetLife. Peter is an amazing person, and opened my eyes to how stupid I can be. Although, I will not take full responsibility when it comes to why I stopped talking to him, but I could have made an attempt sooner. I'm just insanely happy for his growth, and I wish that we could have spent more time together. He's a great guy. I want to kidnap him. Just put him in my suitcase and make sure that he's going to hang out with me in Houston. haha

With my head being so far in the clouds (and not in a good way. In the way that makes your thoughts cloudy with a chance of fucking up your life), I almost lost someone that means the world to me. I'm so sorry. I think the best thing I can do to make a couple of my friends happy is to be a better person for Skip. To do that, I need to make a few changes in my life. Those changes are a little too personal for these journal entries.

-takes a deep breath-

Life can be so crazy sometimes. So fucking scary. I hope I don't fuck everything up for me. I'm really scared.

BUT!

Aside from all of that, and putting all of that on the back burner until I get to Houston, I want to make the last few days in LA the best I've ever had.

It started last night. Skip and I flew back to LAX. We met a cool guy on the plane, and got to hang out with a kinky friend right away. Ryan is amazing. Kornzilla is even more amazing for letting us stay with him for a few days. Who's down for hanging out? Let me know.

I was born Wednesday, January 7th, 1987, at 12:48am EST. Which means, that my birthday begins tonight at 9:48pm PST. We still don't know what we're doing. I just hope that liquor is involved in some way that night. I make silly vows to myself. =] They make me smile.

Time to get ready for Garden of Heathens teary-eyed. I feel like I just exposed my soul. hehe

Goodnight to all, good day to others, and may peace be with you all throughout your day and your lives. =]