I dont know the next time ill be on
Hell im suprised im on now
I miss melo alot
Kinda think im turning back into the melo junkie I once was


My cousin is back from the military
I thank god hes back safe
were throwing a party for him today
I love you Pvt. 1st class Cummings
(I dont know what his rank is anymore lol)


I have found some happiness
Found some light
Theres this guy named chase
he makes me smile alot
=]


I dont know what happened between me & brian
Theres no telling
Hes not speaking to me anymore
Im sure my bro played a card in that
But then again im not speaking to my bro
oh well Fuck that


I have incredible friends
whom I love very much
& they will be there the night I get my letterman
=]
It'll be a proud night for me


Last but not least
I love you melo
& I love all you on here


We've been through some hard times
Yall been there every step of the way


Im a combined effort of everyone I know
& all of you that have helped me


Thank you.

Where I live, Let Me Live without this!
Empty Bliss, selfishness
Im So Sick..


Im tired of being
Treated like im
Shit


Its annoying


& So Are the morons
that I have to put up with


I want to someones ass
Doesnt matter who
Just throw someone at me


Rawr.

Could you do this to me.

Hate me today

Hate me tomorrow...

Hes leaving...
Should I tell him?

Athletic Prep.



Music Junkie.



Emo.



Retro.



In Love.



Wanting Something I Can Never Have.



Nature Loving.



Might as well face it
Im just a


Girl.

Soo I was told today
Im basically wasting my time
Loving someone
Who doesnt even have a dime
Hes just gonna get screwed
Like our dads do
Then I hear hes treating people like crap
Hes been very irritable lately
He makes me so mad
Im pretty much always frustrated now
& yet he makes me so happy
I love to hate him
& I hate to love him

Id give this flower to you
Just to see the look on your face
Just to maybe see a smile
Just to say I love you
Too you
Just to see you look at me
Just to see you thinking
Probably to see you turn away
Id give this flower to you
Just to see what youd do





This is how I feel today
I had to register for school
& the morons fucked up the schedule
I hate dealing with dumbasses

Damn.

Would you say I love you back?
Would you turn away from embarrasment?
Would you stand there & not know what to say?
Would you go after me when I walk away?
Would you tell me Im sorry?
I want to know.
I want to find out.
But Im scared.....

Im to the point of
Screaming.

Ive spent wayy to much time
listenin to fall out boy
I dont even like fall out boy
............

Dear heart
I saw this boy
A few days ago
Drop dead gorgeous
A smile that screams
"eat your heart out"
A sense of humor so great
Makes you wonder
Why you ever left
....Prepare to break

Sometimes we let the greatest thing
We've ever had
Slip right through our fingers
& We didnt even know it until it was gone
Now that we want it
We know we never can....

bitch.

Well today my lovely bro decided to call me
Which was nice cuz I havent heard from him in forever
But then told me some news that
Made me wanna just give up
The guy that im "going nuts" over
Next summer is thinkin about
Moving to Missouri........
FUCKING MISSOURI!
Iono maybe he expected me to flip
I wanted to
I didnt though I kept it calm
But hes more than likely gonna do it
=[
It fuckin BLOWS MAD FUCKIN HARD!
...........................
Yay
Depression sets in

SOOOOO
This is another one of those
Guy things
Where im madly crazy about him
We've dated a few times in the past
& pretty much alwyz been crazy about him
I used to have it under control
Id date people & it would stop
Except for the thinking
The thinking about him never stopped
I wanted it too
I even tried to hate him
& that would work for awhile
Until I talked to him...
Thats probably where I go wrong
Its just really hard not to talk to him
Anways ive been chasing him since
The end of may
& Im pretty sure its not gonna happen
No matter what I want
The only thing thats stopping me
Is when I hug him or when hes got his arm around me
It just feels sooooo right
Everything in the world just stops & goes away
Im more care free....& his best friend
My Bro knows it
So its pretty Obvious that hes got to
I know hes not that imperatively stupid
I just dont know what to do....
So help me
Do I stay Or Do I Go?

I was looking through all my friends
The ones that I used to talk to on here
like 3 YEARS AGO!
Not alot of them get on here very much
They were there for me when I needed them
& I thank them for that
Whether I knew them in person or not doesnt matter
Melo has changed alot in the 4-5 years ive had it
Makes me sad to see it like this
Never the less im still here
I may not update alot but I do get on
I still have drama in my life
Im trying to pretty much drop all of that
I dont talk to as many people as I used to cuz thats all they cause
& for the one who tell me I carry around a lot of drama
WELL SO DO YOU SO FUCK OFF!
I miss the melo world.......

"2 Am and im still awake writing a song"
I often feel as if im lost in the lil world of mine it makes me very sad... I often feel as if im alone...sick and hated........I dont know what to do nemore
"Remind the world that u are no longer in it"

Wow it has been awhile....omgahh so much stuff to say... Courtney went on her 1st date wens. im going over there later.... Ive pretty much been gone these past couple of weeks....yea well newyz later