So last week nothing happened which means I'm in shit creek this week. The Ops Man is on a PMS power trip mild manner medic to super bitch right in front of your eyes. Partner is in the hospital with another heart attack and now I"m stuck with a couple of bitches it's going to be a long night. The snow is melting and the air is wet so all the breathing troubles will be coming out of the wood a month early. That and I have a headache over the biz I'm trying to start. Through in a few ghost from the past and the only cure is caffeine, cigars, and the best therapy known to medics "Bring Out the Dead"

"and what are those voices saying", "their saying KILL MARKIS"

So the temp has finally broken over 32 degrees and I"m know wearing a vest instead of my winter jacket. I know that March in the month of last minute snow storms but it still doesn't keep me from going to the garden department and plan what to plant this year.

Quick update before getting to the point it has been decided my son is getting another set of tubes for his ears but the adnoids are staying in...

But on to the title of this entry. We I have always loved woodworking as many of you know. Well one of my friends has been bugging me to join him to make boats of all kinds. From simple Canvas canoes to full on Sail boats. Don't get me wrong I would love to build boats Brian has helped build many of them before but he has done everything except the woodworking. I have always fended him off by saying we have not location big enough to under take these projects.

Well the little shit found a building at the right price. The location sucks but it really doesn't matter because we mostly are going to do special order stuff. It's hard for me to say no. The fixed cost will be REALLY low and the variable cost will be covered by the down payment.

So it looks like I'm stuck. Tomorrow we see if we can get approval to buy the building. If we get approval chances are we will be going all the way with this business whether we want to or not.

So adventure, scariness, and reflection all in just one call and under 20 minutes. This is how it played out. I was transporting a dumpester run to the hospital when my partner started to rub his chest. After asking him if he was alright he started to take nitro. (mind you I was in the back with the pt and he was driving) Shortly there after I could quickly tell that he was having another heart attack. He started to become SOB and Diaphredic when we got to the hospital he could bearly focus enough to operate the pass card for the hospital doors. I ordered him to go and get check out but all he could keep saying is that he had a job to do. We finished dropping off the pt and my partner collasped into a near by wheel chair. He was rushed to a room to start being evaluated and treated. I wanted to stick around but he told me that I need to take care of "Our People" and I was to leave him. He got on the phone to see if the student that was with use could be my partner until a replacement could be found so we would still have coverage. Last I heard he was sent to the ICU and it looks like he will be signed up for Bi-pass surgery, because the stents just aren't doing it.

It scares me to see him like that for many reasons. First he had been my partner for 5 years now. That is almost a longer than I have been married to my wife. I really do consider him family. I don't just call him my brother because it is the trendy thing to do in EMS, he truly is a brother to me (all be it a much older almost the age of my father brother)

But it goes beyond that, I'm a lot like him. We both do this job because we care. We care about the people in our commnity and the complete stranger. We both also know that for some reason we are drawn to working in an ambulance. We both find it odd the idea of doing another job. We are both willing to put our lives on the line to save other. But one key diffence I don't want to end up like him.

I don't want to be doing this job to the point that I"m almost dying of a heart attack while on-duty. I have said it before and I will say it again this job is for young single guys. It is not place for guys that are married or over 50.

So know comes the contomplation of what is my fall back plan? Sadly I can say I don't really have one. If tomorrow I was unfit to work in a rig I wouldn't have anything to fall back on. For a guy that used to be very nomadic the thought of being stuck is a hard one to swallow.

I think I need some time with a good caburndish and some fine rum to figure all this out. Because although I love what I do I don't want to do it until I die.

I got my final paycheck in and I made a few dollars less than $47,000. I can't really complain I have been able to cover all my needs and most of my wants while still being able to put a few dollars a way this year. But with you take in the fact all the bullshit, brushes with death, work related injuries, the politics, and the stress. Than the fact that I work 60 hours a week instead of 40. I'm left wondering if it all is worth it?

So the lady at the bank is one thing but I have to work with the worst EMT we have today. This guy makes chimps look smart. He totally failed his EMT-S so he decided why not try and get my medic! On top of that he is also going to get his correction certification despite the fact that MI has closed 30% of all its prisons and the market is OVER LOAD with correction people right now. Than for some reason he starts bitching to me about how he is going to take his ex-wife to court over sole custody for his kids. Now lets think this one out he has conviction on his record that although they are mistameners it all voilance realated. He doesn't have a stable job, he is doesn't have stable day care for his kids they bounce around from house to house when he is working, he has a well know hx of shell we say Shitty parenting skills and to top it all off he wants me to come testify to his parenting abilities even though I have told he point blank I think he is a shitty parent.

I could go on about how monumently stupid this guy is but I wont I need to get some beer and soon

So I was working my normal day but I had a student with me. Now I"m one of the few medics that loves to answer and ask questions. Well this student was asking tons of quetions about cardiac rythems and monitors. So when we got paged out for a 16 y/o male that was having a reaction from an H1N1 vaccine I figured this would be the perfect case to show the student the many things about cardiac monitoring. My early dx was anxiaty or a mild allergic reaction. Either way the kid was fine when I got to him. BUT when I ran a 12lead on him it came back positive for the early signs of a heart attack. I almost shit myself but at the time he was S/S free. I didn't really thing much of it until we had a 17y/o girl that started to throw PVCs after having a reaction from the same lot number of H1N1 vaccine. Well after some propting from friends and other medics I turned him my findings to the Heath department.

Well I spent the first part of the day answering questions that I didn't have good answers to like "Why the hell did you even do a 12 lead on the male pt?" the next part of the day we spent confirming that I knew what I was talking about like explaining how I hooked the 12 lead up and than it was fallowed by the worlds biggest thank you from one of the nurses that was giving the vaccine because she knew that the kids that had reaction were having cardiac reaction not just anxiaty. Finally the day ended with a cluster fuck or moral and ethical questions that were based on whether my findings were strong enough to discard that lot of H1N1 which would leave the county unprotected for months(lots of schools and praggers included) or go ahead with the vaccine and you the edict "the needs of the many out way the needs of the few"

So here I sit waiting to see will my findings and report of the findings save lives of God only knows how many children or will this mean that H1N1 will run wild through the county hurting/killing 100s because I couldn't keep my mouth shut.

I NEED TO GET DRUNK!!

This weekend is going to be awesome off to the sauna for some much need rest and rejuvenating than off to the woods. It's going to be great times.

Here is a cool video of a kids first archery kill that is set to the song of Fred Bear. Beware the video is not for the faint of heart or animal lovers.

So the list of passed for who wanted the H1N1 vaccine. Out of all the people only 4 will not be getting it. 2 have medical issues that doesn't allow them to get it and the other two... well one is me. I'm holding to my guns that this vaccine is risk and in my mind too risky for me to take it. I'm not advicing anyone on weather or not they should get the vaccine or not. But I just know it's not for me. Do your research and than make your own choice. There is risk no matter what you choice.

So I was in a motor vehicle accident at work yesterday. A lady pulled out in front of me and I had to swerve to miss hitting her. In the process I struck a telephone pole and fire hydrant. I totaled the unit I was in and had to be back boarded and taken to the hospital. I got a MRI, x-ray, blood work, drug tested, and a lot of worried looks. I'm alright nothing is broken although today it feels like it but that is normal for me after an accident.

The worst part of the accident is that my wife called the station looking for me because for what ever reason I wasn't answering my phone. Well the guy at the station started off with "Look if there is anything I can do let me know and how sorry he was that this happened" Well my wife didn't know what he was talking about and the guy had to tell her what he knew which was I was in an MVA and was taken to the hospital. My wife was shaken but this wasn't the first time I had been in an accident although it is the first time I was taken to the hospital for it. She is tough though instead of breaking down she started calling people to find out what really happened. She finally got a hold of me and I could tell her for myself that I was alright.

Both of us would have been ready to go but an EMS thing is to share stories of similar events like the one I just had. Needless to say both me and my wife were reminded about how horrible this could have been. JOY

I'm back at work today a lot of people told me that I should have taken the rest of the week off but I wanted to prove to myself and everyone else that this is just part of the job. It is understood that when we put on our boots we except the fact that this stuff happens. It's a powerful point that I'm trying to make but I also feel that I need to prove to myself that this didn't affect me and I can still do the job. So far it's working despite that constant pain. Oh well the price we pain.

So the letter is written and I will be turning it in tomorrow now it is just a throw of the dice. If I get the job than I get more authority, money and headaches. If I don't get the job and the person I think will get it than I have to get fired and find a now job. It's a turning point to say the less.

Michigan this week who knows the next

What the hell does this mean. After a summer of run and 50s it finally warms up and now the Fall colors are starting to show. First they are a month early, Second ITS 80 OUTSIDE. This is the first colors walk that I have taken in shorts and tee shirt. This has been a weird year for weather.

So I took a week and than some off to travel to see some friends, family and some $hitty ass doctors. See the friends was great when we weren't drinking we were planning on what to drink the next night. The family was alright mother has went from a clinical hoarder to a dumper. It is just scary. Finally we get to the doctor part of the vacation. There are good doctors and there are bad doctors and then we have this guy instead of making a mis-dx he chooses to use a caught all dx that is bullshit. If you don't know what is wrong than just say that, don't use a fad dx to cover up that you don't have a FUCKING CLUE. I get home from all this only to find out my brother-in-law moved in next door, my niece is staying with us for about a week because my other brother-in-law is getting his face removed and to top it all off just before I had to sign into work and deal with that SHIT I got stung by a BEE. So now my arm burns like hell I need booze and I need it fast

So my brother-in-law calls me up and says hey do you want to come to my dads deer camp for the weekend. This camp is awesome it's a modest deer camp build in the middle of no where and when I say nowhere I mean in the middle of rich old guys summer cabins. This "rustic" camp as they put it has Direct TV, Central Air, Electricity, indoor plumbing, the bait pile is wired for sound and video, a shower, a indoor toilet, and a refig. But of course when his dad finds out that I had a job taking people into the woods guess what I did all weekend?.... That's right Cook in the heat outside in the fire, sweating my @SS out. Oh well I impressed my brother-in-laws dad to the point where I got and open hunting invite for this fall. It's all worth it.