My mom got a puppy. She is uber cute! Her name is Portia Ellen, shes a White teacup poodle and LOVES me.. She looks like a lamb. She puts mom & daddy bob in a better mood. Ive also found myself excited to get home from work so i can play with her.

We have been looking at bridesmaid dresses and this sounds so horrible but the dress i really love well.. i dont honestly think it will look good on 4 of my 7 BM's.. Ayla, Bee & Bobbi are tiny so i know it will look good on them.. its just my other voluptuous gals like Krista, Tiff, Lisa & maybe even Ashley that im not sure it will work. Im just not sure it will flatter their body types. When we take aunt Jannette to lunch Lisa is ganna go w mom & I to try on the Dress that i had Bee try on. I figure if Lisa could pull it off the rest can.

Im not a very good bride. Im not a bridezilla at all.. actually i dislike making decisions so im like the opposite. its difficult to get me to get all crazy on something hahaha I just trust it will work out. im layed back. mom said im taking away the whole planning of a wedding from her because i really DISLIKE bridal shows and refuse to go to them. why do i if i already have everything planned out? i know what i want & all the big stuff is already done for the most part.

My real dad called & booked Mine & Dans Honeymoon. Its a 7 day Mexican Rivera Cruise with stops in Cabo, Puerto Vallarta and Mazatlan. We aren't doing any excursions in Cabo but we are going to Zipline in PV & Off road in Mazatlan! Fuck yeah! we get to ride ATV's in the jungle or something.. twist our arms to make us do what we love on our honeymoon!!! haha everything is paid for the only thing we are responsible for is any alcohol we drink on the ship as well as anything we buy on & off it. but soda & food & entertainment as well as all the tips for the crew are all included in what my dad is doing for us. and he said the room is as nice as the Carribean one i went on w him when i was 19. I am superrr excited.

mom is freaking out over everything. im not surprised tho. she keeps getting mad and saying Dan & I need to be more involved... um.. with what? i mean really all thats left if confirming the invites, tux & Bm dresses. Ok we need to go pick out our wedding bands & get them on layaway so we can start making payments on them. Im not freaking out about anything though.

Um.. I think thats it as far as wedding stuff.

Dan is freaking out with all the baby talk.. He wants kids. Hell we have 4 names picked out.. i just think that its been a year since we got engaged (3/17) and he didnt realize it would go by so fast and im insurance is dropping me cuz of my age & im not in skool anymore so Dans been looking into getting me on his work one.

I that there is a lot more going on at this point in time then he expected there to be. We both hate that we've been together 6.5yrs and it feels like we have NOTHING to show for it. no money. no house. nothing. it sucks. but we will make it work. i know we will. ima try & get another job. I need to get my shit together for school and pull my head out of my ass & start my life already. stop relying on my parents. (thats something Dan & I have in common) I really hope good things start to happen, Not only to us but for the whole country. there are people who are way worse off. Its Karma. the USA thinks we are big shit so what goes around comes around...
that was a lil off topic lol

Well this is really long and i can honestly keep typing up random stuff. it feels good to just sit and type sometimes. my hands are able to keep up with my brain on a keyboard better then with a pen & paper.

I really wish i had more friends local to me and not 30+ miles away... I wish i knew more stoners to be honest. It would be nice to have them not be flakes either.

Ok. well.. im done.. for now. Ima take another darvocet & maybe watch a movie. :]